cos i've got an elastic heart
by snifflyfists314
Summary: at least, that's what she wanted to believe, wanted everyone to believe. six times maya hart could relate too much, and eventually snapped. one-shot. one-sided lucaya.


_**A/N: Here's a little one-shot I churned out. WARNING: mentions of self-harm so if you're triggered by that, I suggest you proceed with caution.**_

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 _I've got thick skin and an elastic heart_

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People think she's strong. How she wished they were right. They think that everything they see is all there is to her. This fighter, this rebel, this brave blonde girl. But everyone snaps eventually.

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 _but your blade it might be too sharp_

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And it was. Way, way, way too sharp.

The blade of that brown haired, green eyed boy that kept cutting into her. Again, and again. Day after day. Every single word, every single movement, the blood seeped out of her. Everything he did made her weaker. It hurt so much, but it made her feel so good. She just wanted to keep feeling more and more of it, but she knew it was unhealthy. She knew it would eventually push everyone around her away, and she didn't want that. But she wanted him.

* * *

 _i'm like a rubberband until you pull too hard_

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And they did. Poor, sweet, girl, they pulled you all too hard.

One way one day, another the next. Do what your heart tells you. What a joke. Her heart and her hart were telling her two very different things. Heart says to walk up to him one day, no context, pull him down and taste him. Hart says protect your honey, don't be selfish you fool. She look at him and _damn_ , does she want him all over her, in places she's never known. She looks at her and she can't bear to look at him again, because it feels like a sin. She tells herself, today I'll do it, today I will. But she never does. And she's being pulled in a thousand different directions every day and it hurts, and she's cracking, and she's breaking. But she stays strong. She's got thick skin and an elastic heart, right?

* * *

 _i may snap and i move fast_

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Maya Hart has breaking points.

Why was she so scared of admitting that? So what if she snapped? So what if she went home and completely lost it? Took the literal version of her pain, and just let a little blood seep out? Would anyone care? No, because she wouldn't show them. No one cared if she snapped. She would just move faster. Look away from him faster. Stop thinking of him faster. Cover up the wounds faster.

* * *

 _but you won't see me fall apart_

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And she swore they never would.

It was a game of sorts. She controlled two different characters at the same time. No, three. No, four. She had lost count.

One, the girl that no one messed with.

Two, the girl who loved her friends.

Three, the girl who loved him. And damn everything he did that made her fall deeper.

Four, the girl who couldn't feel anything.

She could have mopped the floor with her tears. Tears filled with unrequited love, which was indeed a bitch. Tears for the cowboy that she never knew she'd love. The cowboy who she looked at and saw the stars. The cowboy who, when he looked at her, she could swear all he was looking at was the ground. And every day she went home, and fell into pieces. She dropped number one at the front door. Number two at the living room. Number three by her room door. Number four, she stayed with throughout the night, her only company the mess of tears, and the blade sitting in her drawer, tempting her with every breath she took, every thought she had.

* * *

 _cos i've got an elastic heart_

* * *

That's what she had. A broken, fallen into pieces, rubberband of a heart. Playing with it in her own fingers, letting it be played by the brunette best friend, with the boy who gave her all this pain. She made it into a smiling sun of a face. He pulled it apart, and however she tried, she couldn't glue it back. So she continued to break it, it was just easier. She wouldn't let him break it with his bare hands, she'd use something sharper. She was smarter than that. That's what she did with her elastic heart. It kept snapping back, until it finally broke.

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 _ **A/N: What do you think? I was listening to elastic heart and reading lucaya fanfic and I realised it kinda fit so yup. If any of you have prompts you think I should write, do pm me cos I'm open to them! Anyway, what do you think? Do fave and/or review, thanks! :)**_


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